Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler . . .

Two National Science Foundation staffers talking:

Lady 1: "he said my behavior was willful professional misconduct."

Lady 2: "And then what?"

Lady 1: "I told him to suck my fat black dick."

Lady 2: "Creative. What'd he say to that?"

Lady 1: "He was real calm. He said: a) my comment was vulgar, rude, and highly unprofessional, and; b) completely illogical."

Lady 2: "Well, he's got a point, yeah."

Lady 1: "If he says another word to me, I'm gonna bust him with a stapler . . ."

--Ballston Mall food court