Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Thursday, February 18, 2010
We're doing some work on the site (migrating it from blogger to a hosted account - we're so fancy) so www.eavesdropdc.com might not work intermittently for the next few days. eavesdropdc.blogspot.com shouldn't be affected. It's all in the interest of progress (and it isn't like we post over the weekend anyway).
And on the 4th day, God created giant slices of pizza
Guy: They're doing God's work here.
--Jumbo Slice in Adams Morgan, 3:30pm on Valentine's Day. Yes, PM.
Labels: Adams Morgan
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
If only your boobs came w/honey mustard dipping sauce
"I'm a big fan of your cleavage. But I'm a bigger fan of chicken fingers."
--overheard at Froggy Bottom
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
This could get ugly!
I was waiting on the Blue and Orange line platform. One of the subway preachers starts yelling his version of the gospel, and a girl in the distance audibly laughs.
The girl next to me, who is apparently full of Christ's love, says: "That bitch better quit laughin', shut up, and listen!"
That's right, you'd better love Jesus, bitch.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Tales from the Snowpocalypse...
Two sorority girls on H street at GW
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Yes We Can
"I'm so glad we can finally come to DC without getting arrested at the White House."
-A very preppy looking girl on the Mall
Labels: Women of questionable character
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
I heart DC . . . bars.
Friday, February 05, 2010
A sign our criminal justice system works
I was walking up 14th street between U & V and there were a bunch of guys standing around - one guy said, "Man, I have way too many felonies to fuck with that guy!"
Labels: U Street
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Alright, see ya at home honey
Overheard at George Mason in Fairfax:
There was a bald guy walking around in the student union, talking on his cell phone.
"I'm not sure how I feel about you giving hand jobs to the guys you work with..."
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
I will parallelogram your rhombus!
"Stop being so uppity about geometry!"
--Outside Foggy Bottom Metro
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
Were you at Cornell with Andy Bernard?
After a very loud argument between a couple and the female getting off the metro ...
Nosy Girl- "I understand where you're at. I was jobless for six months, and I went to Cornell!"
Sad Guy - "Yeah, it has been rough."
Nosy Girl - "Seriously, I mean, I went to Cornell! An Ivy League school. You know it's bad if I can't get a job right away."
--Orange Line Metro
Monday, February 01, 2010
I believe you mean illusionists.
Early-40's Dude #1: I'm not like that anymore. I've matured.
Early-40's Dude #2: Really? Show me. Do something mature.
Early-40's Dude #1: It doesn't work like that.
Early-40's Dude #2: You know, magicians and psychics tell me the same thing.
-Loudoun County Connector bus
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
I call shenanigans.
Crossing the street in front of Gelman library, 20 year old guy to his friend:
"Yeah, then I finally found my lap top...in the dumpster...covered in semen. So that's pretty much how that went."
Monday, January 25, 2010
End of the story: he was beaten to death with a prosthetic leg.
Waiting for the elevator doors to close inside Union Station metro -
Guy (as he jumps into elevator): "hurry up and close the doors before any wheelchairs come in!"
(chuckles to himself and looks around to see if anyone is in agreement - we're not.)
Guy again: "Whew! That was close...I mean jeez, they already get free parking."
Friday, January 22, 2010
She needs her own boyfriend, you mean.
In a restaurant bathroom in Penn Quarter:
Girl 1: I don't know, I just think she's depressed and she needs a boyfriend or something.
Girl 2: Well I mean she keeps f***ing your boyfriend, so I guess she needs a guy.
Girl 1: Yeah, I guess that's why she and I aren't on really good terms right now.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
I'm hoping for some Potbelly's ads on the site...
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
You heard it here first - suck it, TMZ
A woman walks into the cafe with her two- or three-year-old son and points to a magazine with Obama's picture on the cover.
"Do you know who that is, sweetie?"
The little boy looks at the picture for a minute, then back at Mom: "DADDY!"
Mom looks around to make sure no one heard - oops!
-- Tyson's Corner Barnes & Noble
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Wait, Is Bette Midler Haitian?
"I talked to Ben and he's in for Bette Midler....that reminds me, I gotta send some money to Haiti. That shit is baaaaad."
On a serious note, you can donate money to help the people affected in Haiti at www.redcross.org
Friday, January 15, 2010
But he makes me feel safe
On the red line, near Brookland:
Woman on phone: What on earth made you want to fuck the night watchman? Honestly, you make the worst judgment calls.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Duh. It was totally Freddie Prinze Jr.
Group talking about Dawson's Creek. After 10 minutes of conversation:
Guy: Yeah, so Dawson was Rachel Leigh Cook right?
Sorry about the lack of 2010 posts so far. The holidays came and went and then your editors spent some time eavesdropping in sunny LA. Here's one of our favorites (heard on Venice Beach):
Cashier: Yeah I'd say that bacon makes everything better. I try to give it up, but then I think, being addicted to bacon is way better than being addicted to crack.
Our humblest apologies. Keep sending those eavesdrops in and we'll work to get them online for the world to see!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Begging for exact change in Jesus name
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Skins fans and Dan Snyder: It's Complicated
"Dan Snyder, one day I will see you on the street and I will stab you with a rusty shank. You will die in my arms. I hate you Dan Snyder."
--screaming fan in the upper deck at Monday night's Skins/Giants game
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Jerry Springer can usually help sort that out.
Woman on cell phone: "No, she's not pushing him for child support yet 'cause she doesn't know who the baby's father is."
-17th & Corcoran Streets NW
Monday, December 14, 2009
I also have a bailout on my Christmas list
Overheard on a train in the DC Metro on Saturday Night (12/12/09):
Two guys in Santa outfits talking to each other:
"Where are we going to say we're from when the north pole melts?"
"I dunno... Queens or something"
A few minutes later:
Random bystander: "Why are you taking the subway?"
One of the Santas: "Santa didn't get any TARP money and his reindeer
Friday, December 11, 2009
It's a hard knock life
customer #1 (older femaler): "yeah, he just got like 12 years, but I told him we'd make it, just like last time."
Thursday, December 10, 2009
He he he. Balls are funny.
Sunday at Lucky Strike in Chinatown - 3 girls sitting at one of the bar tables which holds bowling balls underneath. A guy walks up and says, "Do you mind if I look at your balls?"
Monday, December 07, 2009
Thursday, December 03, 2009
Technically, you are an idiot.
Labels: Tourons (Tourist + Moron)
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Don't you mean Le Rugrats en Paris?
Overheard on the Metro Red Line:
Friday, November 20, 2009
Damn those trick questions.
Guy #1: So, you didn't get the job?
Guy #2: No, but now the CIA thinks I have sex with goats.