Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Mayor XXX?

Tourist, looking at photo of Fenty and Obama eating at Ben's Chili Bowl:
"Is that the president having lunch with Vin Diesel?"

Monday, June 29, 2009

Understanding of female anatomy fail

Three female coworkers discussing their disbelief of the TLC show "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant." Male co-worker chimes in:

"...I mean, it's kinda just like the people who eat a bunch of hot dogs in those contests. Where do all the hot dogs go?"

Friday, June 26, 2009

I could use some context here - and a catechism

One woman to another: Well, all the other Catholics in my family are Puerto-Rican sized.
Overheard at City Club of Washington D.C.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

I know my French is a little rusty, but...

...at Third Edition in Georgetown:

Girl 1: "No, I have no date. My life is pathetic."
Girl 2: "It's not pathetic, it's just missing a certain je ne sais quoi."
Girl 1: "And by je ne sais quoi, you mean cock, right?


Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Didn't know they let frat boys be teachers

Man talking to group of women

"Yeah, I'm a third grade teacher. So I drink A LOT"

Monday, June 22, 2009

They're made by Germans, so they gotta be good.

Mom to children at Target (Alexandria):

Who put the sham-wows in the cart? Who!? You people will believe anything you see on TV.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Barack's Row?

Group of late-teens/early 20s (possibly Republican interns), at Matchbox, on 8th Street SE:

Girl (to the rest of the table): "I mean, he's only been President for a couple of months. What has he done to deserve having an area of the city named after him?"

Boy: "I know, right!?!"


I think by now you recognize this guy.

On a crowded green and yellow line train pulling up to a very full Chinatown/Gallery Place platform.

Driver, in a very reasonable tone: "alright now, you people want to get off this train onto the platform. There are a whole lot of people on the platform who want to get on this train. [perfectly timed pause] There is a conflict there. You people on the train, however, have the upper hand. Use it responsibly and have a great day"


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Those are two things I'd like to avoid and I'm straight.

overheard downtown, a (presumably) gay man on his cell phone:

"I figure I'm safe. I can't serve in the military, I can't get married. It's awesome!"

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

What a pain in the ass

Late forty-ish guy concluding business sounding cell phone call:

"So I heard you know all about my hemorrhoids now."

- Overheard outside Pentagon City Mall on Thursday

Monday, June 15, 2009

If there's no Forever 21 I'm not interested.

Outside Farragut North entrance (Connecticut & K), two intern-age girls, one pulling a suitcase.
Girl not pulling a suitcase says:
"Oh, don't get too excited. It's not a real mall, it has grass."

Friday, June 12, 2009

No more Gossip Girl similes!

Teenage girl: "He's like an English Chuck Bass...(awkward pause)...except that Chuck Bass is British."
-overheard at Wednesday's Santigold concert at the 9:30 Club

Thursday, June 11, 2009

All aboard the twitter train

We're on the twitter! Follow us at: http://twitter.com/eavesdropdc


The Soviets had it so rough

Overheard at the Van Ness Metro:

Two new interns stop at the bottom of the broken escalator:

Intern 1: Oh, no, they didn't turn this into stairs.
Intern 2: Yeah, its like Communism! We have to walk up!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

You aren't talking about the metro, are you?

It’s like cobweb city down there. Which is why I read all that smut - got to keep it moist.
--Overheard on the metro

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

What's in the box?!?!

Balding 50 year old man in serious business suit to colleagues walking down 7th Street in Chinatown:

"It all started with Dick in a Box..."

Monday, June 08, 2009

Not a bad place to draw the line, I guess.

Three people, one guy, two girls waiting for a table at a downtown resturant.

Girl 1. That waiter is hot, I'd go down on him.
Girl 2. Me too, he's yummy.
Guy. I'd give him a hug.
Girls laugh
Guy. I'm trying to be a metrosexual but I draw the line at oral sex.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

It is always good to dream big

"My goal for the summer: catch hepatitis in the real world dc hot tub"

Sounds like a theme for a birthday party to me

Two guys, 20's, grilling on their front porch:

Guy #1: I think I should have a holiday. You know, like a day where everyone does the stuff that I like to do.

Guy #2: Like what? Smoke cigarettes and watch porn?

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Making up for the severe lack of recent posts with this winner

Overheard in a nail salon in Dupont:
group of girls celebrating an occasion with a group mani/pedi...
girl 1: No, really, I use Plan B all the time...
group laughs
girl 2: Honey, have you ever considered getting a plan A?

We are slackers

two guys and a girl outside a bar in foggy bottom,
Guy 1: What do you guys want to do?
Guy 2: Melt.